How hard can it be for a company with 1000 engineers to create a canary region before blasting their centralized changes out to everyone.

Every change is a deployment, even if its config. Treat it as such.

Also you should know that a strongly typed language won't save you from every type of problem. And especially not if you allow things like unwrap().

It is just mind boggling that they very obviously have completely untested code which proxies requests for all their customers. If you don't want to write the tests then at least fuzz it.